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A Bad-Girl's Guide to Weight Loss Surgery
Pre-op Journal
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July 2001- December 2001

7/13/01 Awww yeah after switching surgeons from Dr. Mun at Beth Israel to Dr. Thayer at the Newton Wellesley Hospital, I finally got a consult date....Dec. 19th...Hopefully it can be pushed up since I wanted to have the surgery done in Dec, but oh well. I put my naem on a cancelation list so now I have to wait wait wait again......

8/27/01 Okay so I called the office today and asked if there was any possible way they could move me up and they said they would put my name at the TOP of the cancellation list!!! YAHOO!!! Now on to the waiting game......

8/27/01 Okay apparently the waiting game goes by much faster now.....THEY CALLED!! 5 mins ago the nurse called and told me I could come in at 11 am tomorrow......EXCUSE MY FRENCH BUT HOLY SH*T!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will keep ya'll updated (that is if anyone even reads this)

9/1/01 Well I did it!! 4 hours at the psychologist, nutritionist, and surgeon paid off. The resident Dr. didn't want me to have the surgery until summer so that I would have more time at home, but I told "the boss"(what I call him) that I want it in Dec. and will not settle for anything longer than that. He told me okay and now he is just going to call back within a couple weeks and give me the definate date!!!! I felt like this would never happen....*SIGH OF RELIEF*.... My pre-op date is Nov. 22nd....till then....i will write when I get my DATE!!!!

9/18/01 Wow only 17 days and I've got my date. Drum roll please............DECEMBER 17TH.......yahoo!! It's what I've hoped and prayed for for the past 3 months...My next appointment is not until Nov 22nd, but I did go to a support group and I was astonished at the amount of people that were there......a huge room FILLED with people.... I was lucky enough to have a friend come with me since my mom is back in NH and I go to school down here in Mass...I loved it....Oprah....that is all I have to say....I laughed, I cried...again, Oprah..hehe :) anyway E-mail me if ya want nwante@hotmail.com ......I can't wait till Nov. 22nd

9/29/01 Well, my nutritionist told me that I could NOT gain ANY weight from that day of my consult to the surgery date. Okay so that has been on my mind for what, 4 weeks now? So yeah I haven't been home for about 4 weeks which meant that I waited 4 whole weeks to weigh myself. It's so very hard to watch what I eat at school. There is not what you would call a variety to choose from there. I have been obsessing over this gaining thing and the first thing I did when I walked into my house was run upstairs and stand on that damn scale (aka "the enemy"). I am happy to report instead of gaining I have lost 3 pounds!!! That is just a huge "weight" lifted off my shoulder. I have been reading stories and looking at pictures of people that have done this and all I can do is cry. I am just so excited to have the opportunity to do this. I just can't wait till next February when my family is going to Florida. It will have been only 2 months since the surgery but I am hoping to at least be down a size or if I'm lucky two. Okay so now I am doing what some people call rambling....email me... nicolecrunk@yahoo.com

10/30 Wow it has been a month since I last wrote here. Is it just me or are these months flying by? MY second and last actual "consult" is at the end of this month and then all I have to wait for is the actually surgery which is only 1 and half months away......*biting nails*....I am unimaginably nervous.... I have decided that if for some reason something keeps me from this surgery like if I am sick and we have to push the date up then I will take that as a sign and not go through with it. Then again I am hoping that this is the right thing to do and that there will be no signs unless they are good ones. Like me losing a couple more pounds before the surgery hehe.....anyway tomorrow is halloween and my friends and I are going to go trick or treating around the neighborhood of our school. Even though we are 20 there are some huge nice houses around us and we want to get a peek inside them....hehe Happy Halloween everyone and stay safe...

11/24 Guess I'm a little slow updating huh? I don't think anyone reads this anyway but whatever ya know.....So yeah I went to my second consult. Walked in asked a couple questions and walked out..The questions I asked was about how long I will be in the hospital, if I was okay to go out for Christmas (the aunts and stuff), and about tubes and such (cause I'm a big baby) and his answers were 3 or 4 days, yes you should if all is well which is expected, and two tubes which will be out before I even wake up and only the catheder(ohh boy that's the one I don't want) anyway it went well and now only to wait for Dec. 10th for my pre op testing and then THE BIG DAY!!!!! AHHHH Scary....Talk to you all later...... Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving

12/2 Just updating ummmm nothing I guess cause I have nothing really of importance to say, except that I am soooo nervous. For a long time after my surgery was scheduled, I was questioning if this was the right move for me. I am finally at peace with my decision and feel that I have made the right choice! Of course I am nervous.....actually nervous as all h-e-double hockey sticks but that doesn't mean it's the wrong choice......I just can't believe it's almost here. *breathe, breathe* Oh boy am I nervous hehe not tomorrow but the next Mon is the pre-op testing. Oh yeah I did go to a, now, mandatory pre-op meeting where I had to pay $50 because I guess I had the "psychologist and nutritionist expertise". Hate to tell them but all that stuff I already knew thanks to the many people on spotlighthealth.com but yeah so totally a boring and waste of money experience. Anyway thanks for listening to me rant and ramble. 2 weeks exactly!!!!!!

12/10 Okay so I am finally back from pre-op testing. I knew how I said that I was comfortable with my decision, but I don't know if I really knew HOW comfortable I was. Today I found out. I walked in with confidence and as I was laying on the table getting examined a wave of peace went over me and I truly realized that I am ready to do this. They could've wheeled me in right then and I would have been fine with it. Anyway a friend was nice enough to come with me (especially since she had to sit in the waiting area for 3 hours) First I went in for the ultrasound and they said, "Looks like you'll be keeping your gallbladder." Yahoo!! I think?? Anyway then off to the nursing staff she asked me a million and two questions and then the little med student came in. He was very nice and then asked me to lift my shirt to examine my abdomen.....OHHHHHHHHHHH he was my age.....how embarassing is that? VERY!! Anyway I did it anyway cause what am I going to do revolt?? I don't think so. So he poked and poked and all was well and then the resident came in ohhhhhh he's like my age too.....What is this?? Embarass Nicole day??? Anyway I did the same with him; poked poked and poked and then they told me to wait for the anethesia (sp?) person and I did. SHe was very nice and told me everything about going in and giving me something for my nerves and I said, "Thank God cause i don't know if I would make it without the meds hehehe." SOOOOOOO then she told me to wait for the blood lady and I did and the she was weird. I couldn't understand what she was saying. Then I started to think ummmmmm I couldn't eat for the ultrasound and aren't I supposed to eat before I get blood taken???? OOPS too late the lady already had begun. Thank God (again) that I didn't pass out. AFter she was like," ohhh you had an ultrasound today? You didn't eat huh? Myabe you should eat something." YEAH THANKS I THINK I KNOW THAT. what was the first thing I did when I got outta there??? I ate......ohhh I was hungry. Now I am all set for the big day!!! I think I will probably update on Sunday just to let ya'll know what is running through my brain the night before. Till Sunday!!!!

12/15 Oh boy 2 days and last night I had my first official melt down. I was crying crying crying. I just feel scared and not about the surgery itself about what it will do. Will I change? I am scared to come outta my shell. I am used to this, being the funny one not ever the pretty one. I am only 19 and have yet to experience life, truly. What will it be like? Just fear of the unknown maybe? I am just full of crazy questions I guess. I had to go on the spotlighthealth chatroom to calm myself down.... I know there will be more breakdowns to come too. I am ready but oh so scared.

nwante@hotmail.com